One Gig Hard Drive

by Kitty & The Rooster

supported by
Gordon Rempel
Gordon Rempel thumbnail
Gordon Rempel This album gets stuck on repeat in my house so often. Love it.
/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $10 CAD  or more

     

1.
2.
03:33
3.
4.
5.
03:28
6.
03:41
7.
8.
9.
03:49
10.
04:01
11.
03:04

credits

released September 21, 2018

★ JODIE PONTO - Drums and Vocals
★ NOAH WALKER - Guitar and Vocals

THE COCKETTES (tracks 2, 4, 5, 11)
Lindsay Pratt + Naomi Shore

Recorded + mixed by Corwin Fox
Hidden Well Studio, Cumberland

Track 3 recorded + mixed by Erik Nielsen
Afterlife Studio, Vancouver

The Cockettes recorded by Harry Gregg
Big Dreamer Sound, Edmonton

Mastered by Brock McFarlane
CPS Mastering, Vancouver

All songs written by Kitty & The Rooster
except Lousy Lover written by Al Mader, aka: The Minimalist Jug Band

Photos by Jodie Ponto

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Kitty & The Rooster Vancouver, British Columbia

Kitty & The Rooster is a rock n’ roll duo from Vancouver, BC featuring Jodie Ponto on the stand-up cocktail drumkit and Noah Walker on electric guitar. They are known for their surf-tastic hooks, clever lyrics, and ridiculously fun shows.

contact / help

Contact Kitty & The Rooster

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: Kitty & The Rooster's Official Bio
We're like Shovels & Rope,with no baby
We're like The Pack AD, with less ladies
We're like The White Stripes, with a cocktail kit
We're like The Black Keys, with better tits

Kitty & The Rooster

We're like John & Yoko, always hanging in bed
We're like Sid & Nancy, with no one stabbed dead
We're like Oprah & Stedman, we ain't tying the knot
We're like Bonnie & Clyde, but we ain't getting shot

Kitty & The Rooster

We're like Barbie & Ken, with nipples & dick
We're like Teller & Penn, but we ain't turnin' tricks
We're like Starsky & Hutch, with an old minivan
We're like Romeo & Juliet started a band

Kitty & The Rooster
Track Name: Sexercise
Damn, that Rooster's so fine
Sorry ladies, he's all mine
That Rooster's a total fox, he's a souped up beefcake
He's like Patrick Swayze and Keanu Reeves in Point Break
He's a chiseled Adonis, a total smoke show
He's got a hot bod and a hot rod that's always good to go
Built like a brick shit house, struttin' around the hood
How do you do it baby? How do you looks so damn good?

The only exercise I get in this world
Is carrying my amp and fucking my girl
The only exercise I get in this world
Is carrying my amp and fucking my girl

Well, how do I do it? How do I look so damn good?
Well lean in now friends and I'll make it understood
I'm not Sweatin' to the Oldies, I'm not Dealin' a Meal
No Zumba, no Rhumba, no Buns of Steel
Thighmaster, Stairmaster, Master Cleanse, that's not for me
No Bodybuilding, no Facebuilding, and I ain't gluten free
Jazzercise and Strippercise, I never even gave them a chance
No Shakeweight, no Slimfast, no Tribal Fusion Bellydance

You don't need to feel the burn of no pain no gain
There's only two rules to learn, this body's easy to maintain
Step one: GRAB YOUR AMP
Step two: FUCK YOUR GIRL
And you'll be looking so good in this ugly ugly world

The only exercise I get in this world
Is carrying my amp and fucking my girl
The only exercise I get in this world
Is carrying my amp and fucking my girl
Track Name: Paid A Million Dollars (To Live Like You're Poor)
You kicked the cock off of the block
You kicked the kitty out of the city
You bought the house, kicked us out the door
You paid a million dollars to live like you're poor

This used to be the cheap part of town
Looks like we're gonna have to move to Kits to keep the rent down
I hope you like it, I hope you like it here

These young lawyer couples seem like they're slumming
Buy high, sell higher, they say it's up & coming
I hope you like it, I hope you like it here

To all the moms with strollers in yoga pants
Out jogging past the reduction plant
I hope you like it, I hope you like it here

You kicked the cock off of the block
You kicked the kitty out of the city
You bought the house, kicked us out the door
You paid a million dollars to live like you're poor

Oh my god, this neighbourhood is like so cool
Isn't this where all the artists used to live?
I hope you like it, I hope you like it here

You gave us the boot with 900 square feet
Now you're living in the skids in a house with no heat
I hope you like it, I hope you like it here

The walls in this old house are thin
We can hear you fucking .... Fucking us over!
I hope you like it, I hope you like it here

You kicked the cock off of the block
You kicked the kitty out of the city
You bought the house, kicked us out the door
You paid a million dollars to live like you're poor

God hates homeowners
God hates homeowners
God hates homeowners
God hates homeowners

You kicked the cock off of the block
You kicked the kitty out of the city
You bought the house, kicked us out the door
You paid a million dollars to live like you're poor
Track Name: It's Got A Good Dance (And You Can Beat To It)
It's got a good dance and you can beat to it

She's eating Jelly Beans in her belly jeans
She's mean as custard and keen as mustard
She's eating popcorn watching cop porn
She plays a B chord on the keyboard

It's got a good dance and you can beat to it

Ease my tears and tease my ears
It's a roaring pain in the pouring rain
Fighting a liar is like lighting a fire
And a blind moan is a mind blown

It's got a good dance and you can beat to it

Sarah Palin was parasailin'
So wave the sails and save the wales
Our dear old queen is a queer old dean
Go help me sod so help me God

It's got a good dance and you can beat to it
Track Name: In Bed
I can't get no satisfaction ... in bed
You can't always get what you want ... in bed
With the lights out it's less dangerous ... in bed
Here we are now entertain us ... in bed

In bed, in bed, in bed, in bed

Well I heard there was a secret chord
That David played and it pleased the lord ... in bed

In bed, in bed, in bed, in bed

Tin soldiers and Nixon's coming ... in bed
It was the summer of 69 ... in bed
I'm picking up good vibrations ... in bed
She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes ... in bed

In bed, in bed, in bed, in bed

Stop hey what's that sound
Everybody look whats going down ... in bed

In bed, in bed, in bed, in bed

It's been a hard days night ... in bed
Come together right now over me ... in bed
Imagine all the people ... in bed
I hope someday that you'll join us ... in bed

In bed, in bed, in bed, in bed

When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me ... in bed

In bed, in bed, in bed, in bed

Well I won't back down
Cause now it's time for the Tom Petty break down

Don't do me like that ... in bed
Here comes my girl ... in bed
You got lucky ... in bed
Running down a dream ... in bed
Don't come around here no more ... in bed
Cause even the losers get lucky sometimes ... in bed

In bed, in bed, in bed, in bed
Track Name: Lousy Lover
WRITTEN BY AL MADER
AKA: THE MINIMALIST JUG BAND

You're sitting with me, you came here alone
You're wondering whether to take me home
Well I'd be delighted, but first I should say
That I'm a lousy lover, a lousy lay

I'm a lousy lover, I'm a lousy lay
No good in the sac, no good in the hay
Conversation, that's my forte
Cause I'm a lousy lover I'm a lousy lay

My younger years were kind of a bore
I was too shy to fuck, too shy to score
Instead of Joy of Sex I read Jean-Paul Sartre
Instead of falling in love, I just fell apart
Well I'm not bragging and I'm not gay
I'm just a lousy lover, a lousy lay

I'm a lousy lover, I'm a lousy lay
No good in the sac, no good in the hay
Conversation, that's my forte
Cause I'm a lousy lover I'm a lousy lay

Confidentially, my confidence is shot
I don't know what I am but I know what I'm not
I'm no sex machine, that's not my claim to fame
Casanova's not my middle name
I'll sleep with you but I know what you'll say
That I'm a lousy lover, a lousy lay

I'm a lousy lover, I'm a lousy lay
No good in the sac, no good in the hay
Conversation, that's my forte
Cause I'm a lousy lover I'm a lousy lay
Track Name: One Gig Hard Drive
900 clicks with a band of dicks
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
On the road at 8 but we stayed up 'till 5
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
Pays 300 costs 250 in gas
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive

Drive all day for a gig in LA
It's pay to play at dinnertime in a cafe
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
Lie to the other band and tell them they're great
And can we borrow your drums and sleep at your place
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive

There's nowhere to play in Thunder Bay
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
8 hours, 5 guys, burgers and fries
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
Timmy's, DQ and a gas station poo
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive

Yellowhead Highway waiting for a tow
4 days, 3 nights, all for one show
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
Blizzard on the Crowsnest, the van's losing power
Hit the timezone and we lost another hour
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive

From Alberta to BC for a soundcheck at 3
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
It's the tenth time this year that we're playing for beer
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
You can't fix a flat with pass the hat
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive

120's too much money for a hotel when you're poor
So we're sleeping in the bass case on the hardwood floor
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
You can't go home to that cute girl's bed
Cause we're driving to Regina all-nighter instead
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive

Sit in the car then you sit in the bar
Sit in the car then you sit in the bar
Sit in the car then you sit in the bar
Sit in the car then you sit in the bar
Sit in the car then you sit in the bar
Sit in the car then you sit in the bar
Sit in the car then you sit in the bar
Sit in the car then you sit in the bar

One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
One gig hard drive, one gig hard drive
Track Name: 4 Non Yukon Concrete Platinum Blondie
4 Non Yukon Concrete Platinum Blondie

We Pedro'd the Lion
We Caged the Elephant
We Minus'd the Bear
We Said The Whale
We Fostered The People
We Protested The Hero
We Young'd the Giant
We Mott'd the Hoople

4 Non Yukon Concrete Platinum Blondie

It was a Three Dog Night at the Temple of the Dog
We got The Byrds, The Eagles, A Flock of Seagulls
Black Crows, Counting Crows, Howlin' Wolf, Steppenwolf
Wolf Mother, Wolf Parade, Cat Power, Cat Stevens
Modest Mouse, Danger Mouse, Grizzly Bear, Panda Bear
Seal and Phish

4 Non Yukon Concrete Platinum Blondie

Miami Sound Machine and the New York Dolls
Alabama Shakes, of Montreal
from coast to coast from town to town
from Dehli to Dublin, it's all around

Boston ... is a city band name
Chicago ... is a city band name
Kansas ... is a city band name
Phoenix ... is a city band name
Portishead ... is a city band name
Beirut ... is a city band name
Toronto ... is a city band name
Chilliwack ... I ain't goin' back

4 Non Yukon Concrete Platinum Blondie
It's a shitty band name
Track Name: Pay To Play
You ain't getting famous, you ain't getting paid
The only one that's getting rich is Long and McQuade
Spend all your time and money for a year or two
The only payment you get is a good review
Think of your scene and every band that you know
The only ones that really made it are the ones that had the dough

Pay to play, pay to play, pay to play, pay to play
We don't pay to play, no we don't pay to play
Our money only goes one way
We don't pay to play

You can get lost in all the bands in Austin
Absorbing the cost and you pay your own way
A folk music conference is a long way to go
To play a hotel room show to folks you already know
Even if you win a Juno and some fame, get on the cover of Exclaim!
But with more players in the game the bottom line is still the same

Pay to play, pay to play, pay to play, pay to play
We don't pay to play, no we don't pay to play
Our money only goes one way
We don't pay to play

Managers and agents will help you live your dreams
But they drain your bank account like a pyramid scheme
How do those industry guys all have a house and car
When none of their bands ever make it that far?
You think they're buying what you're selling, but they're selling to you
You think that you're the farmer but you're really the food

Pay to play, pay to play, pay to play, pay to play
We don't pay to play, no we don't pay to play
Our money only goes one way
We don't pay to play

We don't pay to play, we don't pay to play
So maybe we'll die in obscurity, but we don't pay to play
We don't pay to play
We don't pay to play
We don't pay to play
Track Name: Damp Cold
Cold as a witch's tit
Cold as penguin shit
Cold as the blood of a snake
Cold as the sores on your face

Wish I had a fever
Heat up my little beaver

Up here in the North babe, it's minus 43
At least we don't live down south
West Coast of BC with your

Damp, it's the damp cold
Damp, gets in your bones

Cold as a well-diggers ass
Cold, my nipple's cutting glass
Cold as a gut shot bitch
Cold as Ötzi's dick

Wish I had a fever
Heat up my little beaver

Up here in the North babe, it's minus 43
at least we don't live down south
West Coast of BC with your

Damp, it's the damp cold
Damp, gets in your bones

Wish I had a fever
Heat up my little beaver
Track Name: Shameover
Shame shame double shame
I've got a shameover

I'm underslept, I'm overhung
It's the morning after an all night run
Bottoms up, shotgun, what have I done?
I've got a shameover

Shame shame double shame
I've got a shameover

Plastered in Paris I'm drunk as a skunk (Pepé le Puke)
Flapping my yap and spewing some junk
I'm just another duck trying to fuck me a hunk
I've got a shameover

Shame shame double shame
I've got a shameover

There's a bottle of ghosts dead in my bed
Round and round that broken record shreds
It's those little things I said that play in my head
I've got a shameover

Shame shame double shame
I've got a shameover

Shame shame
Shame shame
Shame shame
Shame shame

If you like Kitty & The Rooster, you may also like: